Take It To The Bank

The old Bob Hope television specials, they would always end with this song, "Thanks for the Memories", and that's how I want to end this year, with an Open Letter to 2017. 

Dear 2017

2017 you were an amazing year for me and my family.  You provided ups and downs, and tremendous memories that we can treasure for a lifetime.  All in all you were not only the most recent year of our lives, but one of the best.  So lets take a look back at a few highlights.

Shiloh National Cemetery

2017 you saw us visit places ranging from the flea markets of Central Arkansas to Callie's Hot Little Biscuits to the Gaylord Opryland Hotel and so much more.  Each stop along the way bringing joy and fulfillment to our lives in their own unique ways.

Centennial Bank Stadium

Jonesboro, AR

Just as our Red Wolves faced a daunting schedule on the football field we faced the challenges of a busy schedule from the multiple audits I and my co-workers faced to the burgeoning schedule of events for my daughter as a high schooler, to the frenzy of activity here at the holidays.  Each step of the way learning and growing as we must if we intend to thrive in God's abundance.

Yes 2017 you were awesome, one that will be hard for us to forget, not sure why we would want to.  You added to our memory bank, you strengthened our bonds, you built upon the successes of your peers of earlier years.  You made us a better family, gave us a stronger faith, enriched us in so many ways, you may be gone but you will not be forgotten.

Pineapple Fountain

Charleston, SC

The Bible tells us in James 4:14

"whereas you do not know

 what will happen tomorrow.

For what is life?

It is even a vapor

that appears for a little time

and then vanishes away."

With that thought firmly entrenched in our minds we need to live each moment recognizing that God is in control.  He will provide for our needs, and His abundance is more than we can even begin to imagine.  

Father-Daughter Banquet

Center Hill Church of Christ

Paragould, AR

While most will measure their wealth by the number and type of possessions they have, or how much money is in the bank.  Our true wealth is being stockpiled on the other side.

Do not lay up for yourselves

treasures on earth,

where moth and rust destroy

and where thieves break in and steal;

but lay up for yourselves

treasures in Heaven,

where neither 

moth nor rust destroys

and where thieves

do not break in and steal.

Matthew 6:19-20

We are given a glimpse of the treasures of Heaven in the relationships we build, the beauty of God's creation all around us, and the simple joys of His abundance shared with us each day.  

Tybee Island, GA

We can take you to the bank, 2017, our memory bank.  You have been a blessing rich in God's love and abundance.  Fair thee well in the annals of history.  Thank you for preparing us for our future.

The Angel Tree

near Charleston, SC

Now we begin to look forward to the appearance of your little brother 2018 and wonder what it will hold.  I am sure of one thing, and that alone.  If God provides it, then it must be good!  

It is with a heart filled with gratitude that this little family will begin the journey of a new year.  No we may not be wealthy at the bank, or in the stock market, but our needs are more than met, we have a firm foundation in God, and the health and well being to serve Him as we enjoy the journey.

Shiloh National Military Park & Cemetery

My encouragement to you, my readers is to take stock of the blessings in your life.  Recognize from where they have come, and build upon them to the glory of God.

Gaylord Opryland Hotel

Nashville, TN

This is how you will 

Make 2018 GREAT!

The Gifts

Merry Christmas to each of you.  As I begin to write it is 5:15 a.m. and I have already been up for close to an hour and delivered my wonderful wife to work at the retail giant to spend the better part of her Christmas Eve managing the madness of today's last minute shoppers.  The upside of this, if there is one, is that my mind has had a little extra time to awaken before I start writing.  Bear with me as I begin because the initial thought may seem a bit unorthodox for the season, but you've likely gotten used to that in this space.

Yesterday I attended my fourth funeral in the past three months or so.  In those four services I have found each to be different in tone and execution.  That is not to say that any were wrong in any way, shape, form, or fashion.  The funeral, or as the term seems to be changing to, "celebration of life", is as individual as each person.  All of this has gotten me to consider my own mortality in at least a slightly different light, and to consider my own services.  I am not certain at this point to what actions this may lead but it is likely that I will put some thoughts on paper as to how I would like for my services to be handled.

Yesterday's funeral was for a cousin who was 5 years younger than myself, and had fought with a form of leukemia, been through a bone marrow transplant, and recently began to reject that transplant.  She left behind a devoted husband, 3 young adult daughters, and a loving set of parents.  It was not hard to feel a portion of the family's pain throughout the services as the memories flooded their minds, and the heartache swelled knowing that their wife, mother, daughter, etc. would not be with them for the holidays or the many special occasions to come.  This is where my thoughts became reflective in nature.

I began to consider the juxtaposition of the holiday season and the giving of gifts with what had been lost.  The biggest thing for me to think about here was opportunities lost.  In a finite way we each have only so much of ourselves to give; time, energy, emotion. . .   However, it is in this sense that we must recognize all the people that cross our paths are a gift.  Each has a unique story to tell, and perspective to share, and each can enrich our life if  we will accept he gift, unwrapping it slowly over time.  The gifts that we see exchanged at the holiday season are often short-lived and of only fleeting significance, while the gift of relationships is one that can often enrich us for a lifetime.

We need one another in this old world, and thanks to the institutions of the family and church along with the building of friendships we can build the support we need.  What I am really saying in all of this is the greatest gifts we can give is the gift of ourselves, and the greatest we can receive is the gift of others.  Missed opportunities may haunt us, but opportunities seized will be powerful and like treasures that cannot be stolen.  The writer of Hebrews said this:

Beware, brethren, lest there be in

any of you an evil heart of unbelief

in departing from the living God,

but exhort one another daily,

while it is called "Today",

lest any of you be hardened 

through the 

deceitfulness of sin.

Hebrews 3:12-13

We have a divine appointment to lift one another up, and be an encouragement to others.  Yes we may have failed at this in the past, but today is a new day, and a new opportunity.  Carpe diem, Seize the Day!  Do just a little bit daily to build upon, or establish, relationships with others.  This is how we will MAKE TODAY GREAT!

The Hats We Wear: Concluded

 

For the past three weeks we have been taking a look at the various roles we play in our lives under the metaphor of the hats we wear.  This was developed around the following 

5 Critical Questions for Self Reflection

What are the roles I currently play or expect to play in the future?

This is the most basic part of the assessment

Who depends upon me, and for what?

This question begins to determine the magnitude of each role

How am I succeeding in each role?

This gives us the opportunity to feel some positive mojo

How am I underperforming in each role?

This allows us to highlight areas that need a tune-up

What do I need to do to capitalize upon the things I am doing well,

while acquiring the knowledge or skills to improve those I am not?

This is where we put the assessment to work

Today I wish to draw this series to a close by examining the final three questions.

Lets begin with the question of:

How am I succeeding in each role?

As with each of these questions, in order to gain full benefit we must be completely honest with ourselves when we answer.  Recognizing our successes can fall at both ends of the spectrum, in that we are often very proud of those things we do well, while at times we get caught up in the minutiae of our lives and sometimes fail to recognize where we are succeeding.  

Most often our successes are pretty straightforward and if we look at the things we are most proud of we will typically see successes somewhere nearby.  For example in my world I am quite proud of my wife and daughter and count it a success that we have established a wonderful Christian home together.  No, we are not perfect (far from it), no one is perfect, despite the facades they might try to put up.  Yet we live in a great deal of harmony with one another, we worship and serve our God together, we attempt to steer clear of the drama that others may seek to draw us into, and we look to the future and consider it, as a family.  There are successes we can, and should, claim in every aspect of our lives.  When we begin to claim these successes, and honor God in them, we will see patterns emerge that can be useful to us as we make decisions about our future.

Multitudes, multitudes in the valley of decision!

For the day of the Lord is near in the valley of decision.

Joel 3:14

In this brief passage of scripture the prophet Joel is exhorting the people to prepare for war.  It is our decisions that will allow us to win, or cause us to lose in the epic battle that is taking place around us each and every day.  Spiritual warfare is real, and if you are not noticing, it could be a sign that you are not engaged, and may already be a prisoner of that war.  

Moving now to the next question:

How am I underperforming in each role?

More often than not this is the easiest question to answer.  Why?  Because in this world it is far too easy to get caught up in the negatives.  While there are those who walk around with blinders on failing to recognize their shortcomings, the vast majority of us know we have issues, and know that there are things we need to improve upon.  Yet we are either poor-mouthing ourselves into believing we can't do anything about it, or we are failing to bring God into the picture.  

When we are underperforming in an area we have a couple of choices, tackle it head on and strive to make it better, or ignore it and hope that no one notices.  We also know (but don't always act is if we do) the ramifications of either course.  The option of facing our weakness head on is daunting and we know that it will require work and sacrifice and must set our mind upon that end result that we desire, not on the details of that difficult walk to success.  The other course should really not be an option, and for long-term success it cannot be a legitimate option.  Ignoring our deficiencies is a recipe for total disaster.  While in the section prior I spoke about my family situation as one of my successes, within that is a BIG opportunity which is to communicate better with both my wife and daughter which will open up new possibilities for further strengthening our future together.  

Another area for me to work on a weakness is food.  I must confess that I, Terry Combs, am addicted to food, I crave it, I desire it, and I must have it every day.  The addict in me not only craves it but in its sweetest, saltiest, carbohydrate and/or cholesterol filled worst forms possible.  For that reason I, for the past five and a half years, have lived with Type II diabetes, which by the way is no fun, but does provide for quite the challenge.  Each day this challenge is constant, and the sad thing is I, just like you must eat, and thus the decisions of what, when, and how to eat become critical.  As a leader in a healthcare organization serving the elderly I see the damage that a lack of self control can cause.  Many of the seniors we serve are afflicted with the same Type II diabetes I have, and because they have often failed to control it they face harsh consequences with their health such as becoming insulin dependent (requiring shots), loss of limbs, loss of eyesight, and some requiring dialysis up to 3 times per week.  Not to be a Deano the Downer, but that is not appealing and it serves to motivate me in my personal struggles.  It is in our struggles that we must look to God for comfort and direction.

Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.

James 4:8

Finally the question becomes:

What do I need to do to capitalize upon the things I am doing well,

while acquiring the knowledge or skills to improve those I am not?

I must state very clearly for the record here, that I don't know how to answer this for you, and that it is something that I must regularly consider in relation to my own life.  We all face changing circumstances, which drive the decisions we make and the answers we provide.  It is up to you to analyze the items from each of the questions we have asked, view it through the lens of your life, and your goals, desires, and dreams and create that individualized plan for your future.

My son, do not forget my law,

But let your heart keep my commands;

 

For length of days and long life

And peace they will add to you.

Let not mercy and truth forsake you;

Bind them around your neck,

Write them on the tablet of your heart,

 

And so find favor and high esteem

In the sight of God and man.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,

And lean not on your own understanding;

 

In all your ways acknowledge Him,

And He shall direct your paths.

Proverbs 3:1-5

Rejoice always,  pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

I Thessalonians 5: 16-18

It is my hope that each of you have gained something from this series, and that you can take some of these principles and put hem to work in your lives that you might find the fulfillment, in Christ, that you desire.  Life isn't always easy, but it can be a joy when we trust in the great and mighty God who created and sustains all things.  If you will put your trust in Him, then you are on the path to Make Today Great!

The Hats We Wear Part 3

Two weeks ago in my weekly post I introduced the following five questions that I feel are key to self reflection.  Last week we began looking at these questions individually, as we examined the roles we currently play or might reasonably expect to play in the future.  This week we move to the second question of who depends upon me, and for what?

5 Critical Questions for Self Reflection

What are the roles I currently play or expect to play in the future?

This is the most basic part of the assessment

Who depends upon me, and for what?

This question begins to determine the magnitude of each role

How am I succeeding in each role?

This gives us the opportunity to feel some positive mojo

How am I underperforming in each role?

This allows us to highlight areas that need a tune-up

What do I need to do to capitalize upon the things I am doing well,

while acquiring the knowledge or skills to improve those I am not?

This is where we put the assessment to work

The question of who depends upon us in our various roles, and for what, starts to show us the relative importance of each role.  As we begin to consider this it speaks to each relationship in our lives and begins to paint the picture of our values system.  For the younger person who is not married and may never plan to be, a vastly different picture may emerge than for a middle-aged husband and father such as myself, and that actually is okay.  

In last week's examination of your roles you should have considered each of the potential roles you play which in turn lays out a framework for the relationships you have within your life.  Moving forward with that it only makes sense, to a sensible guy like me, that we think about those relationships and how others are affected by what I am doing.  Lets take a look at a few of my dependents by role below:

Husband 

In the role of husband it is pretty obvious that I have a 

wife that depends upon me for love and support.

Dad

Again this one is pretty obvious that my daughter similarly would 

depend upon me for love, support and guidance.

Church Deacon/Treasurer/Teacher

In the congregation that we are a part of there are a number

of people who depend upon me to provide leadership, 

maintain financial stability, present the Word of God

accurately and understandably.

Employee

The organization I work for depends upon me

to again provide leadership, set an example,

learn lessons from the data that passes before me,

and use that to help cast the vision for our future

and improve our processes.

Some of these may on the surface look pretty simple, but in reality we cannot look at them completely in isolation.  Although we would like to put each role into a box and be able to live within one box at a time, that is NOT possible.  The world we live in is complex and so are the relationships we experience.  This is where I tend to jump off the bus of work-life balance that seems to be in vogue, in favor of work-life integration.  In my little mind work-life balance has the implication that we can live a life of one box at a time, which I believe to be impossible.  It seems to me that we must live in multiple boxes all the time with each role being connected in some way to the other.  Several of the writers, bloggers, podcasters that I have come in contact with recently bring out the point that in order for us to say yes to one thing it means saying no to another.  In an economic model this might be referred as tradeoffs.  So I ask you, what are you saying yes to, and by implication what then are you saying no to?  How we answer this question should follow with the values we hold dearest in our lives, and if we take a look over the course of time we will begin to see the patterns emerge and the results that were borne out in the various relationships.  Will we learn?

My model for approaching this work-life integration model goes back to know who we are and what we value.  By looking at the primary roles that we play in our lives and understanding how they are interrelated we can begin to put together a much clearer roadmap to success across all our roles.  As a Christian I would suggest we look to the words of Jesus as recorded below:

"But seek first 

the Kingdom of God

and His righteousness,

and all these things

shall be added unto you."

Matthew 6:33

When we put things into the proper perspective and strive for Christ's glory and not our own, then we have a much better opportunity to succeed at life.  No it won't always be easy, but it will be rewarding if we will stay the course.  MAKE TODAY GREAT! 

The Hats We Wear, Part 2

Last week I talked about all the various hats we wear and the 5 critical questions for Self-Reflection.  This week we will begin to look at each of these questions in a bit more detail.  This type of exercise in Self-Reflection should put us in a good position to set those all-important goals for the coming year.

So, if you will recall the first question I posed last week was:

What are the roles I currently play or

expect to play in the future?

I also captioned this question by stating that this is the most basic part of the assessment, which I truly believe.  These roles tend to be relational in some way or another and fall into at least three broad categories: Family/Friends, Career, and Spiritual.  You may have more areas in your life, but these three are common to the vast majority of us, and I would contend that any other categories are likely just branches or sub-categories of these three.

If we are going to talk about relationships being at the center of each role being played in our lives, then I think we need to look back to Genesis 1:26 as a starting point:

Then God said;

"Let us make man in Our image,

according to Our likeness;

let them have dominion

over the fish of the sea,

over the birds of the air,

and over the cattle,

over all the earth

and over all the creeping things

on the earth."

Here God clearly sets us apart from the rest of His creation, and more importantly, in my opinion, He sets the standard for our relationship with others.  By stating "let us make man in Our image, according to our likeness," it leaves little doubt about how we should view others.  When we will look at others as being made in the image of God, it should impact the way we treat them.  God expects respect for His greatness and power, and he goes on in several places in scripture to highlight the love and respect we should have for one another.

And just as you want men

to do unto you,

you also do to them likewise.

Luke 6:31

"A new commandment I give to you,

that you love one another;

as I have loved you,

that you may also love one another."

John 13:34

These verses then set the foundation for our relationships and the roles that we will be playing.  As we build anything it is necessary to have a firm foundation, and these principles are bedrock upon which we can certainly build a strong and faithful life. 

Within those three categories there are many roles we may be called upon to play and each requires a different blend of skills or recipe for success.  Given that the holiday season is a time filled with many gatherings and tremendous amounts of food, it is only fitting that recipes should be a part of our discussion.  So here is my recipe for relational success:

Prayer 

(make it a point to pray for others first)

Patience

(knowing your own weaknesses and challenges, 

understand that others also face similar

if not more difficult circumstances)

Perspective

(be able to step back from a situation 

before leaping to conclusions)

Blend each of these in equal parts and allow them to simmer slowly. 

For additional flavor season with Love and Kindness.

Personally I love food that cooks slow and the flavors are allowed to build and blend together.  Such it is with our relationships.  The longer and slower we allow them to build the more we should be able to savor them.  When we keep this in mind it should powerfully influence how we take on each role in our lives.  This week think about your own recipe for relational success, as an impetus toward better fulfilling the roles in your life.  This is how you can Make Today GREAT, and perhaps tomorrow GREATER!